In our day to day life, we may use a mask for a few different reasons. We either want to alter or conceal our identity, for protection against environmental hazards, or to pretend to be someone else. Just like a physical mask, we can often use emotional masks for the same reasons. Conceal our emotions from others, protect ourselves from feeling difficult emotions or to pretend to be perceived emotionally in a way different than we truly feel.
Emotional masking isn’t always a negative thing. Have ever been anxious before an interview but was able to go in and present as confident? Well, you used masking to manage the anxiety and get through that experience. Not a bad thing in my opinion. But how long can we mask emotion?
Indefinitely is surely not the answer. Wearing a mask, at some point, gets uncomfortable. In the Marine Corps we trained to use gas masks. Your breathing is a little restricted, it can get hot and uncomfortable. Think about COVID and wearing masks. How long did it take for you to get uncomfortable?
Emotional masking can get to be the same. When I was in Iraq and we had to mask up, I wasn’t going to just randomly take off my gas mask until it was safe, regardless of how uncomfortable I was, but I knew that at some point it was coming off. Maybe you can relate with the COVID masks, you knew at some point it was safe to take it off. Imagine if you never felt safe to take the mask off. What would it have been like to live day after day, year after year wearing a mask and never taking it off, always having it on 24/7? How would that have impacted you?
You may have found yourself just starting to wear that emotional mask or maybe, you have been wearing it for most of your life. Are you tired of not getting a break from wearing the mask? Maybe it’s time to find safety, drop the mask and breathe freely.
Interested in learning more?
If something here resonated and you’re curious about exploring it further, therapy can be a space to do that thoughtfully and at your own pace.
This content is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for psychotherapy.